Back when I was in elementary school we had to take a yearly tests in reading and math. I can’t recall what they were called, but I guess they were similar to what today’s kids take although they didn’t carry the weight No Child Left Behind did. Although I was an avid reader and a good student I never scored as well in reading comprehension as I did in word recognition. Well folks, it looks like the tables have turned on me
If you recall I recently wrote about the occasional difference between what I hear and what TV personalities are saying, actually an improvement if you are a fan of the absurd. Well my eyes are in cahoots. Here’s a few alterations that resulted from reading too fast.
At work I was researching red light cameras for a blog I was writing.
I found an article about their extreme unpopularity and how many drivers feel they’re less about keeping the roads safe and more about generating money. It went on to state that some states are sensitive to the criticism and make sure some of the money goes to a good cause. Here, you read what they do.
“Some states limit where any excess revenue generated from the program can go. In Texas, for example, any revenue in excess of what it costs cities to run the program goes to trauma care centers that care for car crash victims.”
I though it said car wash victims.
I thought of poor old Dukie Dog, our family pet. He loved nothing better than going for a ride. He just had to hear the word and he was whining and circling about. One day I took him for a ride in my VW – to the drive thru car wash. He was traumatized.
Then there was the day last winter in the midst of the polar Vortex. So many people ended up with frozen pipes that plumbers couldn’t keep up with demand. And of course this being the era of social media, a friend posted her experience on Facebook. She’d finally found a service who could come out to her house the same day. Clog Busters.
I was stumped. Did they send little dachshunds through the pipes.
Then I realized it didn’t say Dog Busters.
I read a blog about a photographer who published a book about homeless men in London in the 1970’s. He visited a shelter for alcoholics and got their permission to take their picture. To show his appreciation he came back and gave each man a print.
I couldn’t believe the agency let him do that. Then I saw the r.
I thought he gave them pints as the British refer to a 16 ounce glass of beer.
And last but not least Let’s start with this advertisement I got in the mail.
Wow I thought, there’s a hair stylist with a sense of humor.
I thought it said Shaky Michaels